It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses

Experimenting.

Take me back to the beach.

I went home this weekend and for some reason it thoroughly sparked my interest, intrigue, and anticipations for the future. I'm not sure if Virginia Beach is where I'll end up but it got me in the mood to pursue real-life. At school all I can think about is graduating "on time", getting my work done, saving money, losing weight, justifying missing some socials, justifying going to others and trying to enjoy life for what it is the whole time. On campus I feel like I'm hiding behind my headphones. Weekends are a good release but not quite what they used to be filled with careless antics and endless spinning and laughter, this process on repeat for three days in a row. I think what I'm lacking right now is something to look forward to. Most of my friends are studying abroad next semester and some are graduating. Hearing them gossip and excite in the expanding horizons that await them and their ever-malleable minds, continues to increase my seemingly unsatisfiable hunger for life.

I've been doing a lot of observing recently. some would call it people watching. regardless, it's entertaining. you see some people completely engrossed in their conversations with friends in a careless, I've-got-no-worries-it's-friday, social-thriving extrovert way while others stare blankly at words floating meaninglessly in front of their sleepless faces. The same scenes, the people just change.

Not much going on in school besides the inevitable fade of motivation. I feel a bit at a stall in my life. On a search for meaning and purpose, I'm hoping something wonderful is headed my way. I need something, anything to happen. Some people believe that college isn't for everyone. I'm definitely in that group. It's not that I don't have fun or enjoy expanding my knowledge of the world around me, It's just the environment. I'm just not satisfied here and I can't wait to see what the world has in store for me on the other side.

for the visual...here are some shots from the 16 blocks fashion show this week featuring a lot of student designers (so talented!) as well as the "Only Girl In The World" Rihanna Video which I LOVE.

Yes, I am a pirate.

"For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone."

-Audrey Hepburn

And here I thought all the beauty, inspiration, and romantic spirit was left in New York...My college, excuse me, BEAUTIFUL college campus has subtly fed me appetizing and inspiring scenes of authentic fall beauty with sporadic notion. The view staring down as I part a path of leaves with my brown buckled boots, the sun falling slowly behind the horse barn and pastures by my house. Definitely a contrast to the cascading skyscrapers of New York or the sand-flavored winds that sprinkle glowing words like "Hilton" and "Wyndham" in Virginia Beach. Yet another world, and this has surprisingly left the thought-provoking hunger of my imagination satisfied.

School hasn't been too exciting, the second you think you're caught up, you realize how behind you actually are. I have been taking a lot of notice of the fact that I make noise when I walk. From my not-so-sterling stacked bracelets to the authoritative clicking of my boot's heel, I make noise. and the combination of this with my musically-induced strut through campus, I feel like I don't complete my days unnoticed, which I don't mind.

I spent one night of this past weekend going to my first sorority social this year, the second night in the fabulous Charlotte, NC and the third going out regularly. (Obviously in college, the weekend is comprised of three nights - thursday through saturday). Going to Charlotte brings me back to the real world. At the other end of my approximate 2.5 hour drive awaits civilization. College in a college town just doesn't seem like real-life when faced with the hustle of reality's stars in the business world and the economic players that enjoy evening strolls in uptown and quaint sunday brunches with friends and mimosas.

Home this coming weekend. I cannot wait. Whenever I have doubts about foregoing a weekend of lost thoughts and incomplete emotion that encompass a drunken college night, I can just picture the empty beach scene early morning and late evening and driving through the Atlantic Avenue streetlights while passing less than native palm trees and sand covered street corners.

and for the visual people...some photo fun i had with the life cycle of my flowers from the boyfriend :)

fashion's.night.out

People who grow up without mothers must be the strongest, most independent people in the world.

Arrival at JFK airport in New York: 7:55 a.m. I immediately and embarrassingly am a little lost looking for my pre-booked shuttle as the "ground transportation" kiosk slips by my wandering eyes unnoticed. Who do I call? Mom. My mom who is hundreds of miles away and currently on the road. there is no way she could help me. But somehow, just calling her and inviting her insight into my confusion makes me feel worlds better, even as she laughs at my situation and at my expense.
back to New York. The land of the foreign languages, the busy, the uninterested and the antagonistic. My failed attempt to get the transportation woman, who eventually did help me, to crack a smile reminded me of this unfriendliness.

Finally, after being awake for 7 hours, I convinced my shuttle driver to just drop me off somewhat near work. I still was keyless to my weekend apartment and it was getting too close to 11 a.m., when I was to start my work day. My plans for a nap, some breakfast, and a second to breathe quickly vanished. Indulging in an aroma cafe "health" sandwich and the day's second cup of coffee, I once again called mom (i'm beginning to think I call her too much after reading over this).
I quickly changed into an outfit that never even crossed my mind. I had been thinking about what to wear for Fashion's Night Out since the minute I booked my flight, weeks ago. But once the grime and sidewalk cracks of soho met the bottom of my heels, i was instantly inspired. it just has that effect on you. You can wear anything you want, it usually just works and if it doesn't quite go together, you don't really care.

Flash forward 7 hours, after sleepily getting through the typical day of intern work, Fashion's Night Out finally began. I changed into my FNO tank and a sequin skirt (picture below) and relished in every second of the thriving fashionistas and fabulous lives that surrounded me for the night. As adorners of faux and real fur alike strutted through the doors, I basked in all their confidence, I met fashion lovers that gave the phrase "coming from all walks of life" new meaning. I exchanged smiles and greetings with Texas high school students and designers with fashion week shows. All of whom share a love and passion for this industry of dreams and their makers, creativity, imagination, and fantasy, all turned into a real, profitable, and fabulous reality.

The smell of cigarettes and designer colognes flirted with the crowded soho street, mingling with high heels and and plastic cups of pinot grigio, the ambiance and allure of the evening instilled indescribable satisfaction in me. I was exactly where i was supposed to be.

Charlotte Olympia, the ladies of Anndra Neen, the gentlemen of Proenza Schouler, Alexander Wang, Jason Wu, Thakoon, Peter Som just to name a few. Oh, the fabulous world of New York and Kirna Zabete. It was simply magical just to be a part of it all.

Here's some pictures from the event

Alexander Wang, Tracy Anderson, and Sarah Easley probably discussing how fabulous they all are

Here's one of the DJ Wolfe dance party that went on downstairs. Thakoon and the designers of Anndra Neen with Sarah and Beth!

Tracy Anderson and I

Jason Wu and I

I spent my Saturday relaxing in this adorable little abode of a couple gracious twenty somethings.

I indulged in the luxurious fantasy life in which i sometimes tease myself with. So instead of saving the little bit of money I do have, I spent my saturday evening watching Pretty Woman and ordering dinner to be delivered: French Toast, a Milkshake and cup cakes. ohh the delicacy...

I'm still in that New York state of mind...floating around campus with my head in the clouds. I'm sure my two exams and one quiz tomorrow will be the lightning that strikes me down to reality. But until then, nothing can shake me of this fashion fever.

On my way home from a long day of classes, I shuffled my cowboy boots toward the setting sun and delighted in this song, which i'll now share with you, that the fate of my ipod shuffle setting brought to me. Brings me back to my lifelong dream of having grown up in the seventies...

expressionofthought

In honor of the Red Dress Gala slideshow I'm compiling for my sorority, those were a couple of photoshopped web images i created for it.

In my 9:30 a.m. consumer rights class, decorated with nodding heads, coffee administering medicinal wake-up remedies, and the whispering chatter of weekend commencement plans, I pretended to indulge in an informative lecture about the Better Business Bureau. As my thoughts drift from assorted project preparations, to my New York returning visit, and what kind of sandwich i would have for lunch, my eyes caught sight of a winter-holiday themed water bottle. The picture on the bottle was a cartoon sketching of a small quiet town in a clear, winter's night. The only sign of cartoon life was a silhouette of an impossibly proportioned woman walking her tiny dog through the snow in stilettos. My already wandering imagination lingered in this image and took me there, trying to envision that silhouette's penthouse apartment and her victorian decorated bedroom. Possibly her wealthy, happy husband, endowed with George Clooney-esque looks, waiting for her. I'm so weird. But there just is no way to contain or control these imaginative triumphs.

anyway. In just a few days I will be flying back to the homeland. Well, Manhattan. not really anyone's homeland. but definitely where the essence of me is unveiled. Since coming back to the mountains of western Virginia, I feel like I'm missing out on something. I feel as if I'm staying in on a Friday night, wondering what everyone else is doing, what's going on. I'm stuck in a sleepy college town while the rest of the world is preparing for fashion week and indulging in pop culture and divine lives in New York City. Although hardly the truth, it's definitely comforting to anticipate something on the other side of the classrooms and 10lb. textbooks.

Speaking of the other side. I am sporadically asked about my future's plans and although there are millions of options. I'm not sure I want any of them. I can't entertain the idea of living the ONE life I'm given working for anyone or doing something that renders me anything less than purely satisfied. we'll see.

I've also decided that i want 3 new best friends: an asian who smokes, one that drinks diet coke from a can with a straw, and one that can thoroughly enjoy driving around jamming to "Blues man" by B.B. King followed "I Hate This Part" by the Pussycat Dolls and casually back to some Led Zeppelin classics.

If I could find just one friend to encompass that all, I'd be happy about that too.

...

3 days..

http://www.fashionsnightout.com/

three.worlds

Time slowed down as the road carried my mom, grandmother, and I away from skyscrapers and honking taxis towards salty air and local farmer stands complete with crabmeat, shrimp, peaches and corn.

My first full day home commenced with the beach and reintroducing myself to North End waves, followed by a few hours of boating and finally friends, family, and a bushel of crabs.

I've been taking full advantage of my short time here; spending every free second I have in the nearest body of water. i've been able to reconnect with my roots, my home.

For as long as I can remember, I have been shuffling through the sands of 54th street and I am positively convinced that there are two times in this world when there is no better place to be than walking down this street. The first being the literal calm before a storm, when the sky dons a mask of intimidation and ominous impression. The beach house wind chimes sing to the abandoned beach streets as mother nature reclaims her territory. The second time possesses a similar calming intrigue: late summer evenings, when the sun and the surfers call it a day and the sounds of crickets surround their bare feet and salty skin.

Out in the water, facing the horizon, as the sun retreats. That's when i feel connected to God on a whole new level, the ocean our medium with its force, beauty, and power.

Now back to the somewhat-real world: college. excited freshman, free spirited sophomores, and careless upperclassmen. I'm entering a new world of stresses and obstacles while trying to remain grounded and sane with an overwhelming course load, sorority duties, and a showcase to coordinate. But if I don't believe in myself that I can accomplish all that and more, who can?

and another zero 7 to get you through late weekday working nights, much like the ones i'm looking at in my near future!

"God gives every bird his worm, but he does not throw it into the nest"

I am a firm believer that this city, this destination for dreamers and realists alike, is alive. It breathes inspiration. The people here merely give it some character, a little personality, intrigue. While venturing these streets, alleys, and parks it's impossible to not be drawn towards it's raw, authentic inspiration. I've come to always carry a sketchbook with me, so I can capture this city's random sparks of brilliance. All the while, it has taught me to be who I am and that it's up to each of us to genuinely enjoy ourselves and celebrate our own unique thoughts, ideas, and dreams.

My last weekend here was my most relaxing yet. Friday I unveiled a true friendship while discovering the flaws in another. I started talking to the right people and ended up having a fabulous night. Saturday was my birthday. I spent it with the most important person on anyone's birthday - myself. So in between chapters of a Jack Kerouac book, I'd lay under New York's summer sun, basking in all its brilliance, and look up at the lingering clouds and purposeful planes and a pair of aimlessly floating pink balloons. I feel nothing but pure satisfaction. I glance at my fellow sunbathers...a distinguished, artistic, and sophisticated couple napping to the tunes of Fleetwood Mac that drift to my towel, which I don't mind. A group of young twenty-somethings engaging in exclusive gossip and laughter. And scattered across the lawn by the Hudson are various families and single, tanned and toned, young new yorkers.

I went to Boston two weeks ago to visit a musically-endowed good friend. Boston and New York come alive at night in two very different ways. New York seems recognize the transition, turning cafes into bars, and family tourists into loud, drunken clusters of young adults. Boston seems to not notice the sun went down. There's still as many people walking the streets, but they're still going out to eat, or just strolling around the quaint city.

That friend returned the visit last night. In between the conversation in Massachusetts and the ones while sipping coronas and watching lady liberty and Manhattan's lights flicker, we were able to connect on a new level. Now that we're becoming older and developing into the people we want to be, we have more control over who we surround ourselves with. We both concluded that the most important element in these people exists inspiration. We hope to be inspired by them as much as they are themselves.

oh...and here are a few of the shots from the intern photoshoot...

and a Morcheeba video to relax you a little bit..